To All the Girls I've Loved Before
by I am hurricane
Summary: Shy, high school junior Stiles Stilinski has never had a girlfriend. Something that his younger much more popular little brother Dylan continually pesters him about. It's not that Stiles isn't interested in girls, it's that he can't seem to get the words past his throat when he tries to ask them out. So Stiles writes them a love letter. But he doesn't send it.


Stale popcorn and old gym shoes that's what the movie theatre on fourth street smells like this afternoon. It's only two in the afternoon but the sky is dark and murky grey, and it's pouring rain. Swarms of people with wet shoes have ducked inside the theatre to get out of the storm and were now milling about the lobby.

Stiles looks past the swarms of people and stares out the theatre's big front windows watching the way the rain bounces off the pavement. It's a social anxiety thing. In a room as crowded as this the best thing for him to do is to pick one thing to distract himself with. He lets his nerves be lulled by the rain for a few seconds longer before his eyes dart back to the line he knows his little brother is standing in. He finds Dylan fifth in line from the till. Stiles leans back in his seat and the cracked vinyl upholstery groans.

Dylan is animatedly talking with hands, and the girl beside Dylan laughs. Stiles smirks as he watches the pair of them. As they near the front of the line Dylan casts a glance through the crowd and finds Stiles, the boy ducks out of line for a moment and sprints over to Stiles.

Stiles straightens up as the nine-year-old rushes up to him. "Hey, how's it going?" Stiles asks, conspiratorially.

"Y-yeah it's good." Dylan rushes to explain, his voice betraying his nervousness. "I just, uh, I want to buy Lily popcorn, and I didn't bring enough. Could I borrow five bucks? I'll pay you back—"

Stiles flashes him a grin and reaches for his wallet pulling out a five dollar bill. He holds it out to him. When Dylan goes to take it, Stiles pulls it away and arches an eyebrow, "If I give you this then you have to wash the dishes." Dylan grabs for it, and Stiles dangles it above his brother's head, "All week." He tacks on.

Dylan grimaces, before casting a glance at Lily who was still waiting in line. He jerks a nod, "Deal." Stiles claps the money into his brother's hand. Dylan clears his throat and tugs at the collar of his blue button-up shirt. He unintentionally crumples the collar. His little brother is one of the most popular kids in his elementary school. He's generally outgoing and confident. And Stiles has long since come to peace with the fact that his little brother is way cooler than he will ever be. But right now Dylan looks more anxious than he's seen him in years.

Stiles gives him a reassuring smile and reaches for Dylan's crumpled collar, "Here," he says fixing it for him. Then he claps his little brother on the shoulder, "You good?"

Dylan blows out a breath. "Yeah, she just makes me nervous, y'know?"

Stiles chuckles good-naturedly, "Trust me, kid, I know exactly how you feel." Stiles glances at the girl in line. She's fidgeting a lot and keeps glancing in their direction.

"Y'know what, I think Lily's nervous too," Stiles says jutting his chin toward the girl.

Dylan's eyebrows shoot up, and he casts a fugitive glance at the Lily. "Really? She is?"

"Yeah, definitely. So how about you help her out, huh? You can offer to carry the popcorn, or if she wants to do that then hold the door for her. Ask if she wants to pick where you guys sit."

"Yeah, yeah I can do that," Dylan says as he glances at Lily out of the corner of his eye. "Thanks, Stiles." He says before dashing back to the lineup. Stiles feels stupidly proud of Dylan at that moment. He watches the pair of them for a minute their sweet with one another, and almost painfully shy. It's awkward but kinda, sort of adorable. His little brother has guts. He's had a crush on Lily for the last two months, and he managed to ask her out last Wednesday.

When Dylan had told him about it, Stiles had done everything he could think of to help. He'd helped him pick out a nice looking navy button-up shirt, jeans, leather jacket, and converse sneakers. Helped him gel and style his hair just right and even lent him some of his cologne. And when it starting pouring rain and Dylan and Lily could no longer ride their bikes to the movie theatre Stiles had offered to drive them.

But as he watches Dylan balancing the popcorn in his arms while he props open the theatre door for Lily, there is a sinking feeling in Stiles' chest. Dylan is nine, and he's liked a girl for a month or two before asking her out. Stiles is sixteen and he's liked lots of girls, he's even had serious feelings for at least five girls before. But he's never asked any of them out. For a moment Stiles wants the ground to open up and swallow him whole. Shame washes over him as it occurs to him that his nine-year-old brother is dating before him.

Stiles lets himself languish in those feelings for a few seconds before shaking it off. He's being stupid. There isn't even anyone he's interested in right now. It's not like he's pining over some girl and not doing anything about it. It's just that in the past with every girl he's liked, he's never been able to ask them out. He just can't seem to get the words past his throat.

Stiles blows out a breath before standing up to make his way to the concession stand. People are weaving two, and fro all around him and in the chaos he accidentally knocks into another guy's shoulder. Some popcorn kernels tumble from the guy's overstuffed bag and pelt Stiles in the chest before scattering across the floor.

"Oh, sorry, man." Stiles blurts out. The other guy looks up from his phone that he'd been watching instead of looking where he was going and glares at Stiles as if he'd bumped into him on purpose. Stiles groans internally when he sees who he's knocked into, Theo Raeken. He plays on Stiles' lacrosse team, and he's hated Stiles ever since freshman year when Stiles accidentally fumbled a pass which had cost the team the semi-finals. Stiles has been riding the bench pretty much ever since, and the other guys on the team were over it, but Theo for some reason had taken his screw up very personally.

"Watch where you're going." Theo grunts. Theo's got about ten pounds on Stiles, and he's got a reputation on the field as a dirty fighter. So ordinarily Stiles stays out of Theo's way. But his dark thoughts have put him in a foul mood, and he's not about to take any of Theo's crap.

"How about you watch where you're going." Stiles fires back. Theo's eyebrows twitch upward in surprise then his face morphs into a slow, sinister smile.

He's just about to say something wicked in reply when the sea of people parts and a gorgeous girl appears.

"Theo!" She calls raising her voice over the bustle of the crowd as she makes her way toward them. And Theo's dark look softens into a smug smile as his girlfriend Malia Tate walks toward them.

Author's Note: Stiles' five letters to the girls that he likes are addressed to Allison (his first crush), Malia (his first kiss), Cora, (his crush at pewee baseball), Lydia, (his first dance). More to come.


End file.
